


Ships in Harbour

by AvecPlaisir



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Drama, Exploring Relationships, F/F, The title isn't meant to be a pun, and all the ships are just potentials, and polygems, but i cannot deny what has happened, oh god the drama, the pearlnet is one-sided, there's also a hint of gamethyst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-13
Updated: 2015-12-13
Packaged: 2018-05-06 10:32:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5413511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AvecPlaisir/pseuds/AvecPlaisir
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With Steven's help, Pearl puts on a special dinner for Garnet--but the night doesn't go exactly as she planned. Of course not. That would be boring.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ships in Harbour

**Author's Note:**

> "A ship is safe in harbor, but that's not what ships are for."--William G.T. Shedd
> 
> Another one-shot, I'm afraid.

“Alright,” Steven said brightly. “Welcome to Starlight Diner! Where stars are our lamps and the sky is our ceiling!" Steven spread his hand toward the sky, grinning broadly. Much of his excitement stemmed directly from the fact that he was staying up extra late with everyone. "Pearl will be your host this evening," Steven continued, indicating Pearl, who gave a small curtsy, "and _I_ will be your chef!”

Garnet sat at the tiny plastic table Steven had brought out on the deck, in an equally tiny plastic chair. She was entirely too large for this set-up--her knees came well above the table's surface--but if she was uncomfortable she didn't say so. On the table in front of her was a toothbrush holder in which Steven had placed paper flowers (cut out of magazines and pasted to cardboard, or hand-drawn with crayon and drooping). Garnet listened attentively to Steven's speech, and when he had finished she clapped politely.

“And Amethyst?” she asked.

“The taste tester,” Steven announced. “Which reminds me--!” and he turned around and ran back into the house. Moments later, crashing sounds came from within.

_“Aw—Steven—!”_

_“Amethyst—no! I told you –!”_

_“Just one more bite—!”_

_“I TOLD YOU NOT TO EAT ALL OF IT!”_

Out by the plastic table, Pearl laughed nervously. Behind her, the screen door to the house slammed open.

“There’s been a change of menu,” Steven panted. His clothes were coated with considerably more mashed food than when he had left, and there were mashed potatoes in his hair. "Uh, Pearl? Can I see you in the kitchen?"

"Of course, Steven--"

"It's _Chef_ Steven," Steven reminded her.

Pearl paused. "Right." she said. "Chef."

"Just give us a moment, Garnet!" Steven called cheerfully to Garnet, simultaneously ushering Pearl inside. "Everything is fine! Please enjoy these compliments of the chef!"

Steven threw some clumsily re-wrapped mints on the table before hurrying after Pearl. 

Garnet eyed the mints warily. They were wet.

 

 

"It's a disaster!" Steven cried, once both he and Pearl were inside the house. He grabbed Pearl by the arms and shook her. "We can't go on! When I told Garnet that everything was fine? That was a lie, Pearl! A lie!"

"Steven," Pearl said, holding up her hands placatingly, "what on Earth--?"

" _Chef_ Steven!"

Pearl sighed. " _Chef_  Steven. What exactly is the problem?"

"I'm not going to name any names," he declared valiantly, "But _someone_ who's not me, and who's not you, and who's not Garnet decided to eat all the appetizers and the main dish."

Amethyst piped up from her position sprawled on the sofa. "Maybe it was Lion."

" _Ame-thyst_!" Steven whined, rounding on her.

"Hey, woah there," Amethyst said. "I thought we weren't naming names."

"Amethyst," Pearl frowned. And while she was frowning she took a quick look around the kitchen. It looked about three times as messy as she'd left it, which was saying something because Steven's cooking hadn't exactly left it neat. She groaned internally, feeling the familiar sense of unease she got whenever things weren't neat. It was like an itch, or a headache--one that kept building until she had done away with the offending mess. She shook her head slightly, forcing the bad feelings down so she could focus on the present situation.

Steven was saying, "--and now we have nothing to serve Garnet!"

"Ste--Chef Steven," Pearl cut into his diatribe, adopting a soothing tone. "It's alright. Garnet doesn't really like eating anyway, that was more for show."

Steven's face fell even further. He was on the verge of tears. 

"Smooth, P," Amethyst said.

"Oh shut it, you," Pearl snapped. She turned back to Steven, backtracking. "Wait--Steven, I didn't mean that. I'm--I'm sure there's something else....that, uh, we could serve Garnet."

Steven sniffed loudly. When he spoke, his voice was watery. "Like what?" 

 "Like, um...." Pearl's eyes flit about the kitchen, but there was nothing readily visible--except _mess, mess, mess--_ to prompt her. She wracked her brain, but for the life of her she couldn't recall what variety of human food they kept around. "Like..." she glanced at Amethyst desperately.

 "Oh yeah," Amethyst said, rushing to fill in the gap, "Like, um--like lighter fuel!"

Pearl stared. _  
_

But Steven seemed distracted. He was cracking a smile. "We can't serve Garnet lighter fuel," he said earnestly.

"Sure you can," Amethyst said. "I eat it all the time. It's just like soup." She rubbed her belly for emphasis. "Tasty."

"Wait!" Steven yelled, throwing his arms out. "That's it!"

"Yeah," Amethyst said enthusiastically. "Don't knock it 'til you try it, amirite, P?"

"No!" Steven cried. "We have _real_ soup! I can't believe I forgot!"

"Really?" Amethyst perked up. "Can I have some? Kidding!" she added quickly, at Pearl's glare.

Steven was laughing. "I just have to heat it up!" he gushed, as he climbed onto the counter to reach the high cupboards. "And there's some old spaghetti in the freezer!"

"Oh yeah," Amethyst laughed. "That stuff's been there forever."

"Only a few weeks!" Steven said, climbing down, soup can in hand. "I bet it's still good." He turned to Pearl. "The dinner's back on," he declared triumphantly.

"Great," said Pearl weakly as the can opener noisily cut through the metal hulk of the soup container. She watched Steven pour the sludge-like material into a pot and wondered if even Garnet would want to eat that.

Steven was still beaming as he reached for the knob to turn the stove on. "Now you and Garnet can have food for your date!"

Pearl froze. There was a beat.

"Your  _what?_ " Amethyst said flatly, from behind her. 

"Nothing," Pearl said quickly, turning. "Steven's exaggerating."

 "My name is Chef Steven and I am not exaggerating!" Steven frowned. "You said you wanted to have a special dinner with Garnet--"

"Steven!" Pearl cut him off. "Please."

" _That's_ why you're doing this?" Amethyst demanded, sitting up. "Is that why you didn't ask me to help?"

Pearl breathed hard through her nose. "I didn't ask you to help because you _never_ help with _anything_."

"I don't help?" Amethyst shouted. "I was the taste-tester!"

"You ate all of the food!"

"Guys, guys!" Steven shouted in the background, waving his wooden spoon around, spattering soup on the ground.  "Don't fight! It's all good! We still got food!"

 "Yeah--well--!"  Amethyst lost steam. She brought one arm up to wipe roughly at her eyes. "You still could have asked me."

Pearl deflated as well. "Amethyst. I _tried_ to ask you. You turned into a bird and flew away, remember?"

"Well I didn't know what you were gonna say!" Amethyst said defensively. "I thought you were gonna start nagging me about something! I didn't know you were gonna go on a date!"

"This is _not_ a date," Pearl said. "I just wanted to do something nice."

"With _Garnet_."

"Well," Pearl flushed slightly, blinking. "Yes." She hesitated. "Amethyst--"

"Yeah, fine, whatever," Amethyst said shortly, cutting her off. She pushed herself off the couch. "It's not a date. Got it."

"Where," Pearl said, "are you going?"

"Where does it look like I'm going, P?" Amethyst said without emotion, pushing the front door open. She let it fall shut behind her and breathed deeply. Already, she could feel herself calming, the tension dissipating quickly from her body and into the dark night. The air around her was crisp and cool; it made her skin feel tingly. She looked over to see Garnet, bathed in light flooding from the windows, still sitting at the comically small table.

"Hey," Amethyst said, after a moment.

"Hey," Garnet replied.

Amethyst considered her. 

"You can hear everything that we say in there, can't you?"

"Pretty much," Garnet said. She paused. "It helps when you scream."

Amethyst rubbed her shoulder.

"I _hate_  when she does stuff like this," she said.

Garnet hummed. "I know."

Amethyst looked up. "You know?"

Garnet's mouth twitched. "You've made that quite clear in the past."

"Yeah, well," Amethyst kicked at the ground. She wandered almost nonchalantly closer to Garnet. "She acts like  _she's_  the only one with feelings," Amethyst frowned. "She doesn't even care about the rest of us! I mean I--" she hesitated, a flush spreading on her own cheeks. She hunched her shoulders. " _I_ have feelings."

There was a pause. 

"I know," Garnet repeated.

 

 

"Okay, here we are," Pearl said, carefully balancing the pot of soup in her hands, as she pushed the door open with her shoulder. She was careful not to breathe through her nose; Steven had added a lot of extra ingredients that she didn't think humans typically put in soup. She had already caught a whiff on accident and she hadn't enjoyed _that_ at all. Furthermore, the pot was unnecessarily large for such a small amount of soup, a little more than a foot in diameter, and the soup was spread so thin at the bottom of the pot that it was crusting. So in essence Pearl wasn't holding soup at all, just a really hot pot. 

Pearl's internal critique of Steven's plan was halted as she looked up to see Amethyst. Perched on the wooden railing next to Garnet. Bent over, roaring with laughter, leaning into Garnet's personal space. Garnet's head was tilted towards Amethyst; she seemed to be speaking quietly into Amethyst's ear.

"Oh," said Pearl, as the door swung shut behind her.

Amethyst looked up, smirking. She and Pearl locked eyes.

Pearl felt so utterly foolish.

"Amethyst!" cried Steven, over the creaking of the door reopening. He was carrying a stack of bowls out of the house, and he walked around Pearl as he spoke. "I thought you left!"

"I did," Amethyst said, tilting forward. She hopped off the railing. 

"Now I need to get another bowl," Steven huffed, setting the bowls he had on the table. 

Amethyst sniggered. "I don't think you have _room_ for another bowl."

"Doesn't matter," Steven said determinedly. "We'll eat off our laps if we have to!"

"No need," Amethyst said. She glanced at Pearl. "I don't think I"m allowed to have soup anyway."

"No, Amethyst--," Pearl said, very obviously trying not to cry. "Please," she swallowed. "Please stay."

"Nah," Amethyst said. "I'll pass."

She brushed past Pearl.

"Where are you going _now_?" Steven complained 

Amethyst paused. "I think I'm gonna go chill with Lion."

"Aww, what?" Steven frowned. He yawned. He put his hands on his hips. "Kids these days," he said, shaking his head and sitting beside Garnet at the table. "Right Garnet?"

"Mm."

Pearl brought the soup to the table, her eyes cast down studiously. Her her long legs folded as she sat in the chair opposite Garnet. She shifted until she was almost sitting sideways. She was forced to continue holding the pot, as Amethyst's observation had been correct. There was no more room for another anything on the table.

 "Well," Steven said. "This is too much excitement for one Steven, I have to tell you. I never thought having my own restaurant would be so hard on the ol' emotions. There were highs, there were lows," Steven yawned again. "One of my own turned on me, ate all the food." He squinted up at Garnet. "The stories I could tell you."

Pearl had been balancing the pot in one hand as she tried to move the bowls to the side so she could set the pot on the table. But her grip slipped. First the bowls fell, hit the table and bounced off onto the floor, then the pot tilted in her hand, clattering downwards and landing face down on the table, spewing its paltry contents everywhere.

Pearl closed her eyes.

"Aw, Pearl," Steven frowned again.

Garnet reached over and ruffled his hair. "It's getting pretty late," she said. 

"What?" Steven said around yet another yawn. "I hadn't even noticed." He blinked down at the soup splattered table. "Well," he said, after a moment. "Maybe I noticed a little."

"I'll tuck you in." Garnet offered Steven her hand. Steven took it solemnly, and they both stood. Steven kept talking as they made their way to the door.

"I'm sorry you didn't get to eat the soup. Or the mashed potatoes." He let out a deep sigh. "Or the peas."

"S'alright," Garnet said, holding the door open for him.

"At least you and Pearl can still have the spaghetti," he was saying when they disappeared into the house.

 

 

When Garnet came back outside, Pearl hadn't moved. Her head was bowed, but as Garnet circled her she could see that her eyes were open now, at least. She was staring, spiritless, down at the overturned pot.

Garnet resumed her seat, leaning back and crossing her arms over her chest. If Pearl had looked up, she would have seen how thoroughly unimpressed Garnet looked. But perhaps Pearl didn't need to look.

Garnet waited.

“I’m sorry,” Pearl said into the space between them.“I wanted to show you that I could be mature about this, and that you could trust me to handle this well, but all I’ve shown you is how utterly _incompetent_ I am—”  Pearl cut herself off, taking a shaky breath. She wrapped her arms around herself. “I can,” she continued, hollowly, “get the spaghetti Steven prepared.”

Pearl made to stand.

“Pearl,” said Garnet. “I don’t care about the dinner.”

“Perfect,” said Pearl, with a twist to her mouth. She had been in the process of extracting herself from the too small seat, but at Garnet’s words she completely abandoned the endeavor. She sat down again, hard. She clasped her hands in her lap. “Of course you don’t.”

Garnet tilted her head. “Of course I don’t?”

The corner of Pearl’s lip curled. She looked to the side.

“You must know by now,” Pearl said. Her voice was low. She might have been talking to herself.“You must have noticed. I haven’t been subtle. That’s never been one of my strong suits.”

There was a brief pause.

“If you’re referring to your crush,” Garnet said, “then yes. I have noticed.”

“Perfect,” Pearl repeated, thoroughly unhappy. “And not saying anything was your way of letting me down easy.”

Garnet frowned.

“I don’t _mind_ your crush, Pearl.”

Pearl looked up.

“But,” Garnet continued, “I’m not going to make this easy for you, either.”

“You don’t _mind_ ,” Pearl repeated. “That makes it sound like you’re merely _tolerating_ —”

Garnet cut her off. “I am.”

Color flooded to Pearl’s cheeks. She stared at Garnet, eyebrows coming together, lost for words. Finally, she cried, “Why don’t you just tell me no?”

“I’ve thought about that,” Garnet said. “I don’t see the point."

Pearl stared. 

"There are only two ways this can end," Garnet elaborated. "Either I end up returning your affection in the way you want, or you get over it on your own terms. Both outcomes seem infinitely better to me than unnecessarily causing the strain in our relationship that would come should I flat out reject your advances.” Garnet paused. Her mouth softened beneath that opaque visor. “I do care for you, Pearl. Surely _you_ must have noticed that. I want us to continue being this close.”

Pearl was breathing deeply, her chest and shoulders rising and falling noticeably. She was looking at the soup, but not really. It continued to drip off the plastic table and onto the deck; she didn’t seem to notice how it was dripping into her own lap as well. 

“There are really only two possibilities?” she asked. She sounded hopeful, strangely so.

“Well,” Garnet amended. “Those are the only two possibilities I’ll allow.”

And she cracked her knuckles ominously.

Pearl’s expression fell. “But there _are_ other possibilities.”

“Technically.”

Peal took a steadying breath. “Such as?”

“Such as we both die before this is over.”

Pearl stopped. Whatever she had been expecting Garnet to say, that wasn’t it.

“Well,” she said slowly, touching the tips of her fingers together, “that’s not what I was concerned about, but that _is_ something to be concerned about.”

Garnet shifted her visor. “You don’t have to worry about that possibility.”

Pearl threaded her fingers through each other.

“That still leaves my previous concern,” she said hesitantly.

Garnet waited.

“I—I just— _know_ myself well enough by now to know there’s another possibility that you’re not mentioning, Garnet.”

Again, Garnet waited.

Pearl was blinking, hard.

“Which is that I _don’t_ get over you, and—and I _spiral_ —,” Pearl swallowed, “—it would be just like with Rose—I wouldn’t have learned _anything_ —”

A sharp shake of Garnet's head cut her off. “Like I said. There are only two possibilities.”

“Garnet, you can’t— _stop_ what’s going to happen just because you can see it coming—!”

“It _won’t_ happen,” Garnet said in a tone that brooked no argument. “In the same way that you don’t have to worry about dying tomorrow, you don’t have to worry about this.”

“The probability—,” Pearl started, voice small.

She was terrified.

“This isn’t about probability,” Garnet said. “This is about my determination to see you through this.”

And she waited patiently as Pearl cried.

 

 

“You said,” said Pearl weakly, some time later, “that there is a possibility that you return the feeling?”

“I did say that.”

Pearl hesitated. “How…possible is that, really?” When Garnet didn’t respond right away, she prodded, further, “Is it _likely_?”

“I’m not going to say yes. I’m not going to say no.”

Now it was Pearl who waited, with eyes rimmed red.

Garnet shifted her visor once more. “I know, more than anyone, that the future is not fixed. I could spell out for you, Pearl, in excruciating detail the exact circumstances under which your project to woo me succeeds.”

She paused. Pearl was frozen.

“I’m not going to do that,” Garnet continued. “Mostly because that’s none of your business. But, more to the point, even if I _did_ tell you, it would not guarantee that you’d achieve it. Actually,” Garnet paused again, for longer this time. “Actually,” she repeated, coming back to the conversation, “it _lowers_ your chance of success.”

“What do I do?” Pearl asked. And she seemed more than a little lost.

“Keep going,” Garnet suggested. “Until you get bored, or until it works out. In the mean time, stop making Amethyst feel like shit.” Garnet stood, and patted Pearl once on the shoulder. “Thanks for dinner.”

Garnet started to walk away. In her lap, Pearl’s hand closed into a fist. 

"And Amethyst?" she said. "What's her chance of success?" 

Garnet stopped. 

"At least tell me how I compare." Pearl's tone was ugly. 

Garnet was looking at her now. Pearl raised her chin.

"That kind of thinking," Garnet said, "is going to get us all killed."

Pearl was breathing deeply again.

"This isn't a _game_ , Pearl," Garnet said, her voice low with anger. "You may have forgotten, so let me remind you. We are _vastly_ outnumbered and overpowered. We barely scraped through the first war, and we had an entire army with us. Now, we don't even have Rose."

Pearl grimaced visibly, but Garnet wasn't finished.

"I expect you, of all people, to know what's at stake here. I'm on your side, Pearl, but at times like this I'm not sure that you're on mine."

Pearl's eyes widened. "I'm on your side," she said quickly.

"Then _act_ like it. For you to put something like a crush over our _survival_ \--"

“It’s not a crush."

Garnet stopped. 

“My feelings?” Pearl continued, perhaps bravely. “You keep calling it a crush. I know what a crush is, Garnet. It’s something human children with underdeveloped notions of self and romance have. It’s something humans feel for other humans when they don’t quite know the other person. None of that applies to my feelings about you. I _know_ you, Garnet. About as well as I know anyone. For thousands of years I’ve known you. For thousands of years you’ve been a constant in my life. You want all the same things I want. We fought a _war_ together--we’re doing _this_ together now—living on _Earth_ —!” Pearl stopped herself, recollected her thoughts. “That human,” she said, steadily, “the mailman who tried to get Steven to perform in that horribly inaccurate production, _he_ had a crush. I don't have a crush."

Garnet's face was unreadable.

Pearl wilted, looking down. "Maybe--maybe you're right. Maybe I shouldn't be thinking about these things now. But, I don't know how not to. I can't not think about how much I--" Pearl hesitated. Her voice, when it came out again, was barely audible. "--how much I want you."

Pearl waited for Garnet's response, but Garnet said nothing. Pearl steeled herself, then lifted her head to see that Garnet's shoulders were shaking.

"Garnet?" Pearl's eyebrows came down. "Are you....laughing?"

Garnet put a hand over her face. She snorted.

“ _Why_ are you laughing?” Pearl asked, shoulders stiff.

"It's nothing," Garnet said, sticking her fingers under her visor to rub at her eyes. Her visor was slightly displaced in the process. "I just wasn't expecting you to say any of that."

Pearl frowned. She wasn't sure what Garnet meant, or why that made it funny.

“But you're right,” Garnet said, eventually, putting a hand on Pearl's head. On her gem. Garnet's face softened. “Forgive me. I’ve been trivializing your emotions.”

Pearl blinked up at Garnet, something warm stirring in her chest.

“You have been,” Pearl agreed.

But she couldn’t muster any strong negative emotion. She was very conscious of the weight of Garnet’s hand on her head; the feeling of Garnet’s thumb on her gemstone went straight to her core. She could think of little else. Her earlier fear was disappearing. Apprehension, doubt, resentment, jealousy—those were leaving too. With three short sentences and a physical gesture, Garnet had dispelled with every dark feeling that had been clawing at Pearl’s insides since the start of this conversation.  _You’re right. Forgive me._ The words swam in Pearl’s head, making her feel dizzy.

"Let's go find Amethyst," Garnet said, lowering her hand.

Pearl reached for Garnet's arm. She nodded.

**Author's Note:**

> It's finals season, so I'm technically not supposed to be doing this but writing this was a much needed distraction and relief. You just read unpasteurized 100% procrastination and instant gratification. From concentrate.
> 
> This fic relies very heavily on my personal interpretations of canon, so it's very possible this won't be interesting to anyone but me. It started with just the middle part of Pearl and Garnet's conversation--from where Pearl calls herself incompetent to where Garnet describes the possible futures--and just kind of exploded from there. Besides the fact that its unlikely that this will ever actually happen, the situation I've described is the closest I've come to explaining *one* way I think Pearl and Garnet would work given what we know of their relationship, and making explicit the underlying nuances I see in the Pearl/Garnet/Amethyst relationship. 
> 
> There's definitely a possibility of there being future fics in this universe, but I already have one outstanding (outstanding as in 'overdue' and 'incomplete', not outstanding as in 'great') fic and I'm not foolish enough to add another.
> 
> Also--if you read this stupidly long story and note and liked it, hey there. Thank you. Let's be friends.


End file.
